A List.

I have a few things to say.
1. I am still a failure at this blog. Sigh.
2. I am also a failure at NaNoWriMo.
3. Here is a stupid list, survey thing. I felt like doing it.


Appearance

I have/had piercings besides the ears.
I want piercings besides the ears.
I have many scars.
I tan easily.
I wish my hair was a different color.
I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
I have a tattoo.
I want a tattoo.
I can be self-conscious about my appearance.
I have/had braces.
I have more than two piercings.

Embarrassment

Disney movies still make me cry.
I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried.
I’ve glued my hand to something.
I’ve laughed until some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
I’ve had my pants rip in public.
I’ve touched something sharp/hot/etc to see if it would hurt.

Health

I’ve gotten stitches.
I’ve broken or dislocated a bone.
I’ve had my tonsils removed.
I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed.
I’ve had chicken pox.
I've had malaria.
I've had typhoid.
I've had jaundice.

Travel

I’ve been on a plane.
I’ve been to Europe.
I've been to at least one other country.
I've never been out of my country.
I’ve driven/ridden over 200 kilometers in one day.

Experiences

I’ve gotten lost in my city.
I’ve seen a shooting star.
I’ve wished on a shooting star.
I’ve seen a meteor shower.
I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas.
I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
I’ve slapped someone.
I’ve kissed someone underwater.
I’ve chugged something.
I’ve crashed a car.
I’ve been skiing.
I’ve been in a musical.
I’ve auditioned for something.
I’ve been on stage.
I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue.
I’ve sat on a rooftop at night.
I’ve pranked someone.
I’ve ridden in a taxi.


Death

I’m afraid of dying.
I hate funerals.
I’ve seen someone/something die.
Someone close to me has attempted/committed suicide.
I have attempted suicide.
I’ve thought about suicide before.
I’ve written a eulogy for myself.

Materialism

I own over 10 music CDs.
I own over 10 novels.
I own over 5 electronic gadgets.
I’m obsessed with anime/manga.
I collected comic books.
I own a lot of makeup.
I own gaming console(s).
I own a car.
I own a bike.
I thrive on compliments.
I thrive on hate.

Random

I can sing low key.
I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
I open up to others easily.
I watch the news occasionally or always.
I like to kill bugs.
I sing in the shower.
I’m a morning person.
I’m a sports fanatic.
I twirl my hair.
I care about grammar.
I love spam.
I’ve copied more than 30 CDs in a day.
I bake well.
My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, blue, red, black, purple, or orange.
I would wear pajamas to school.
I like Martha Stewart.
I laugh at my own jokes.
I eat fast food weekly.
I’ve not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.
I can’t sleep if there’s a bug/insect in the room.
I’m really ticklish.
I like chocolate.
I bite my nails.
I’m good at remembering names.
I’m good at remembering dates.
My memory sucks.
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.

Family

I’ve sworn at my parents.
I’ve planned to run away from home before.
I’ve run away from home.
My biological parents are together.
I have a sibling less than one year old.
I want kids.
I’ve had kids.
I’ve lost a child.

Bad times
 
I regularly drink.
I can’t swallow pills.
I can swallow numerous pills at a time without difficulty.
I’ve been diagnosed with depression at some point.
I have/had anxiety problems.
I shut others out when I’m upset.
I don’t have anyone to talk to when I’m upset.
I have taken/take anti-depressants.
I’ve slept an entire day before.
I’ve plotted revenge.

Write or Die Experiment

See, I'm just trying out this new website. And I don't really know how it works. But I have given myself 10 mins to write 500 words and I'm hoping that they'll mean something. Also, I think that there is some kind of consequences associated with slacking, but I don't know what they are so I'm hoping to mess up to see one. Hmm. I'll hit the pause button. I wonder if that does something. I just did it, I only get to pause once. Well, interesting. I learned that you can begin a sentence with and or because. Which every elementary school teacher told me not to. And I think that it is helpful but my brain has been hardwired to say no and I'm trying to break down that block. If I click away the screen starts pink and gets darker and darker. Is this where the punishment comes in? Can one even write 500 words in 10 mins? I'm only at 165 at this pint and I've got 6 minutes left. I really should be writing an essay for Camp Fire. I have to talk about why I want to be a CIT or counselor in training this summer. But I hated the experience and don't want to do it again. Sounds like a great essay to me. I keep letting the page go red but nothing bad has happened yet. I do really like this tool though. I think it challenges me and I feel pressure to write when I am using it. I let it go red and it started singing peanut butter jelly time. That is legitimately the most brilliant thing ever. I frakking love this website. I also the word frakking. I enjoy that there are different levels and I can't wait to see what some of the worse punishments are. I still need 200 words. I don't think I am going to get there. But I can try. Ok. So I decided to do NaNoWriMo this year. And it really scares me, because I don't have a good work ethic for that and I don't have a good topic that's welled flushed out but I am still going to do it. I need to google Reincarnation. Because that is the topic of the book. Sort of. Or that the main character can sense reincarnation in others, and can tell if you are the reincarnation of someone famous. 100 words 1 min. OH YES. I don't even think I can type 100 words a minute. In fact, I doubt  I can. But I am just going to keep typing words and hope for the best outcome. In fact if I do succeed I will be shocked but super happy. I am jsut typing randomness right now, not even thinking about what I am saying. I am having a really hard time doing this though. WORDS wrods words words words words time time time time time time time time time ah crap failed.



*But I did get to 500 words in 10:15.

I really should do this, huh?

I thought I could make a comeback on this blog, maybe. Anyways, I was inspired by Kayley's blog about favorites and thought I would make my own.



This video is so spectacular. Cate is so spectacular. I appreciate her creative but critical wit and how she really seems to get the internet communities and their mindsets.



My friend Hannah made this video and it blew me away. I love the way that she tells a story that is personal to her, but can apply to anyone.



Story of my life. That is all.



This explains my sense of humor in a song.


and


I love these. So true.



All time favorite. Wheezy is so creative and even though he has hundreds of videos, I never get tired of them. Also the quote "Crazy Poopy Sandcastle."



I'm not usually a fan of poetry but Amanda has changed that for me.



Best interview ever.



How perfect is this?

It's Been a While...

     It has been a while. I was in an odd place; I found myself unable to put the effort I needed to into my writing, and unable to like anything I wrote. It is summer now, so I will have more time to work on writing and creative projects. For today, I thought I share a draft of a script I wrote for a video I am making. This will be the voice over piece. Enjoy.

                On my way to doctor’s appointments, sleepovers, work, and other places, posters for Harry Potter have been surrounding me. It seems that every turn, every streetlamp, and every corner reminds that “It all ends” on July 15^th. As excited as I am for this day, I am terrified at the same time. For me, it does seem like the end of it all. I know the fandom won’t die out, and I know there will still be events, but it will be different, morph, and change. I don’t know if I can handle that.

                I’ll admit that for the past few weeks I have been blaring Oliver Boyd’s “End of an Era,” on repeat, much to the enjoyment of my parents. But, I had the realization that, I can’t live like this. My life shouldn’t be consumed with thoughts of dreading the day, being nervous for the day, and anticipating the day, because I know that the friends I have and the community I am part of will never die out.  If anything, this should inspire me to continue to support the fandom, to be more active in it, and to ensure that it lives.

                I had this realization while attending the kickoff of the ConTour. I was sitting there, listening to beautiful music, surrounded by amazing people who have the same passion and drive that I do. These people, whether I know them or not, are my friends, they are the ones that have the same feelings that I do, and that will continue to make this community exist.

                I don’t need to fear, “the end,” because “the end” doesn’t exist for me. A change will occur, I’ll give you that, but the end isn’t coming, and I doubt it ever will, at least not in my heart.

Two fairly nostalgic sappy videos in a row…I need to fix that. The next one will be more silly and fun. 

Check out the other "slightly sappy" video here.

Regrets.

     I think I pushed myself way too hard trying to do BEDA. I wanted to complete the rest of it but I don't think I can. I open up a blank page and stare at nothing, I think nothing, and have nothing interesting to say. I definitely still want to blog however. I hope to blog 2 or 3 times a week.
    
     BEDA has been a great experience. It has pushed me to write more and to write about myself which is always something I struggle with. But I've learned that pushing myself so hard, this early, I haven't put out the kind of quality I want to. I haven't shown my writing ability at all.